cele's Blog
WHY
August 19, 2007AS I SIT AND LOOK AT MY LIFE SLIPPING BY FOR NOW, AND AS IN THE BLOG BELOW, FINALLY GOT TO TOUCH THE FACE OF MY DAUGHTER SINCE SHE LEFT ME FOR GOOD IN FEB, I LOOK AROUND AT THE PLACE I MUST LEAVE, THROWING THINGS AWAY, THAT I CAN'T TAKE, NOR HAVE A PURPOSE, YET, KNEW MY SISTER THAT IS ONLY ONE YEAR OLD OF ME, AS 'GOD' PREDICTED TO ME 8 MOS AGO, SAID SHE WOULD DIE IF SHE WOULD NOT STOP DRINKING, SO, OF COURSE I TOLD HER, SHE LAUGHTED IT OFF, 'SHE WAS ANNOUCED SHE IS DYING, THEY DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH TIME SHE HAS, 'I DO', 'WHETHER YOU BELIEVE IT OR NOT' YET I ASKED 'GOD' DOES SHE HAVE A CHANCE, YES CELE ONLY IF SHE STOPS NOW, AND LEARNS TO LOVE LIFE, AS YOU LEARNED, I ASKED GOD TO TAKE ME INSTEAD OF HER, SHE'S ALWAYS BEEN SO UNHAPPY, BUT, WE ALL HAVE A TIME TO COME, AND TIME TO GO, AND HER HUSBAND IS DYING OF CANCER AS WELL, BUT, ALSO, GOD SAYS HE PUTS UP A GREAT FIGHT, AND HE HAS TIME, FOR HE IS NOT READY, YET I KNOW HIS TIME, FOR I ALWAYS KNOW THE TIME, YET, AS, IN OTHER BLOGS, THIS DOES NOT SADDEN ME FOR LEAVING THIS EARTH, BECAUSE WE SIMPLY LIVE ON AND ON, AND GO BACK INTO THE UNIVERSE SO, WHY AM I SAD, TO MUCH AT ONE TIME, SIGH SO MANY MEMORIES WHEN I PACK UP MY APT OF A DAUGHTER I ONCE HAD, AND NOW MAYBE HAVE A CHANCE, MAYBE OF GETTING TO KNOW HER AGAIN, BUT THIS IS A LONG ROAD, DO I APPRECIATE YESTERDAY, TOUCHING HER FACE, ABSOLUTELY, DO I WANT MORE, OF COURSE, BUT, UNDERSTAND, IT TAKE TIME TO RECONNECT AND HEAL BROKEN HEARTS, AS OTHERS ON THIS SITE,
~NOW, IT'S GETTING TO ME, I CRY ALOT NOW, MORE THAN LAUGH, I SAY 'GOD' I'VE DONE ENOUGH, LET ME COME HOME, FOR MY PURPOSE MUST BE DONE, EVEN THOUGH I DON'T FEEL IT IS, BUT WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM ME, ONLY TO HEAR, WHAT I CAN GIVE BACK TO YOU, IN WHICH YOU ALL KNOW I SO LOVE TO HELP AND GIVE~, YET, SITTING THERE, AND NOT KNOWING MY 'GRANDMOTHER' WELL THAT DIED MANY YEARS AGO, IN A HORRIBLE HORRIBLE WAY, YET IF YOU READ MY OTHER BLOGS YOU WILL SEE AGAIN, I FEEL 'NO' DEATH, FOR THERE IS NO SUCH THING, IN SAYING THAT, BEATEN', TIRED AND WEAK, HEAR THIS WOMEN SANG TO ME SMILE WHEN YOUR HEART IF BREAKING SMILE WHEN YOUR VOICE IS SHAKING
~SMILE WHEN YOUR FEELING LONELY~,
~SMILE WHEN YOUR HEART FEELS SADNESS
<small>SMILE WHEN THERE IS NO MORE GLADNESS</small>
<small>SMILE WHEN YOUR FEELING SORROW</small>
~SMILE WHEN YOU FEEL THERES NO TOMMORROW
YOU HAVE SURVIED THRU THE WORST OF TIMES, SO 'YOU' JUST LOOK 'UP' AND SMILE
~I DON'T KNOW THIS SONG, AND THESE ARE THE ONLY WORDS I REMEMBER, AND PROBABLY REWORDED, BUT CALLED MY MOM, AND SHE'S LIKE 'DEAR GOD, CELE' THAT WAS MY 'MOMS' FAVORITIE SONG,
AND
SHE SANG IT WHEN SHE WAS SO SO SAD, AND THOUGHT THERE WAS NO TOMMORROW,
~SO, JUST SMILE
<small>I BELIEVE OUR PAST LOVED ONES PASS OVER OF COURSE, BUT I ALSO BELIEVE THEY COME AROUND US WHEN WE HURT OUR MOST, AND ARE SO SO TIRED</small>
~AND, I HAVE FACT TO THAT, FOR THEY NEVER LEAVE US
SO, ANY OF US THAT ARE HURTING SO BAD, AND OTHERS ON HERE ARE, 'JUST SMILE
LOOK UP AND SMILE
LOVE CELE... A LOYAL FAN..